It may be your best friend who speaks before thinking or your arch-nemesis that tries her utmost to belittle and ridicule you. Either way, we have all had the misfortune of dealing with a person who was not entirely pleasant. Wish you had handled the situation better, more effectively or tactfully? Look no further for ways to deal with frustrating people.
Scenario 1: your arch-nemesis lives for ganging up on you with her friends and she is constantly mocking you and talking behind your back. You can’t report her for bullying, because her comments are very sneaky and subtly insulting…
I know it is very tempting, but I wouldn’t advise that you retaliate. If your arch-nemesis is spreading rumours about you, this is usually because you have had some bad blood recently spilled, and she is merely trying to hit back at you. Have you heard the saying “If you ignore it, it might go away?” While this isn’t an excuse to be complacent, it holds true for handling nasty things like people spreading rumours and gossiping about you. IGNORE THE PERPETRATORS. Often they just want a reaction from you, so don’t give them the satisfaction. The unpleasantness will die down soon, and many people won’t even remember the rumour that was spread about you. Be careful; don’t involve teachers unnecessarily-this could make you look like a weakling, and worsen the taunting, because your arch-nemesis may become more gutsy…
Scenario 2: your best friend frequently puts her foot in her mouth, and you can’t decide whether her intentions are malicious, or whether she doesn’t think before she speaks. She criticizes your family, lifestyle and taste in boys, because you are different. She is condescending, constantly putting you down to feel better about herself. She tells you to give up on your dream, and that your feelings for someone are unrequited. (Why would anyone be friends with a person like this)? You want to end the relationship, but you know she needs a friend, and there are other friends in the group that you cannot bear to leave…
This is a tough, and very precarious situation. My best bet is COMMUNICATION. She is bound to pick up that something is wrong, and when she questions you, mention what she said or did that annoyed you.
As a last resort, you can simply tune out of conversations that she dominates. Acquire a mental state that enables you to not hear what she is saying.
If she insults you, and you are itching to retaliate, bite your tongue. You don’t want to say anything in the heat of the moment that you might regret.
Lay down boundaries for your relationship, so that she knows when enough is enough. She has to realize that you can only take that much verbal abuse before you draw the line.
Interact with her as infrequently as possible-the road to distancing yourself from her because this is clearly NOT a healthy relationship. Spend more time with the members of your friend group that you enjoy being with.
By Relashini Munsamy